📣 Raise your hand if you’ve ever been personally victimized by one or more of the following phrases: “Just be kind to yourself”,  “Just slow down and take a break” or my own personal nemesis “Calm down, it will be OK.” 👎

Somehow, these self-care mottos have become popular despite their dismissive and frankly, tone deaf vibe.  If you ask me, patriarchy- infused-late-stage-capitalism™️ has fueled this rise in popularity, but since it’s helpful to focus on what we can control, it’s kind of like...DUH you would do anything to feel better and you’ve probably already considered “trying harder.”

Many of my clients come to me after years of difficulty and confusion digesting these messages, often inadvertently reinforced in treatment spaces.  But the fact is, you don’t need someone else to tell you what to do.  You just want relief from the constant pressure to perform, produce, ease, and appease that leaves you feeling exhausted and out of control.

That’s where I come in.

Humans are hard-wired for survival and I believe that we won’t do anything, especially repeatedly,  that is exclusively unhelpful— everything we do has a purpose, from hyper-focusing on tasks to shutting down during a conflict with a partner.  

Together, we figure out how the experiences bringing you into therapy help you survive.  We build an understanding together about the purpose, so you can meet the need in a different way.  

By just replacing these behaviors without understanding the purpose and addressing it at the source, rest or relaxation is going to feel like a threat every time.

Change Starts Here

⚙️When you’re driving to a new destination, do you ever turn down the volume of the radio when you get close so you can see better?  It makes total sense.  You don’t need your ears to be able to see the numbers on the mailboxes, but turning down the volume increases your ability to focus on where you’re going.

My job is to help you turn down the volume of the internal alarm bells that ring so loudly, it makes it hard to focus on your destination.

You will experience relief when we update these survival strategies with consideration of your current strengths, abilities, needs, and desires.

I use EMDR to help my clients heal from the experiences that led to these strategies, establish new ways to meet their needs and feel more in control of their lives.  My approach is a blend of the following: 

• Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) - A non-threatening space to allow your brain to sort, color code, and file past stressful experiences

• Narrative therapy- Considers the story you’ve heard about what it means to be “good”

• Feminist therapy- Challenges the agreements and expectations set by systemic sexism

• Structural Dissociation theory- Curiosity about “What happened to you?” instead of “What’s wrong with you?”

  Ready to feel more in control of your life?

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